Thursday, August 6, 2009

What do I do?

I just made one of the hardest decisions for my future. In order to get into the BFA program for Illustration, one needs to apply and send in an application in the spring or summer. The summer deadline is past and I received an email from my Illustration professor, Brother Hull, a very influencial man in the art department. He wrote me this. . .

Melissa:

We recently checked the list of August Illustration BFA applications and discovered that you had not applied. You are very talented and we had hoped that you would continue through the BFA program. Even though the deadline for applications has passed you may still apply. The application can be downloaded online at our website at visualarts.byu.edu. After filling the form out take it to Jeana Clark in 3122 JKB.

If you are not applying tell me why.

Bro Hull


I couldn't believe that they were allowing me to still apply even though the deadline was past. I figured if they were going to make me such an exception to the rule, I ought to at least consider applying. It's not something I had been taking lightly. I had worried over this decision for the past year and had finally come to the conclusion with a sound mind at the end of winter semester. I decided I would not apply. It hurts my pride not to continue my studies in Illustration. I will graduate with a bachelor of arts instead of a bachelor of fine arts. This is unless my professor can somehow convince me otherwise. I wrote him this email back. . .

Brother Hull, it's actually really hard for me to talk about this because I'm really torn. I hadn't been planning on applying to the BFA for several reasons. Now that I'm married, I wanted to focus more on putting my husband through his schooling. I intend to graduate, but I had wanted to do it as quickly as possible so that I could have my days free to work full time. If I did get into the BFA program, that would mean at least an extra year of school. That would be a full year of tuition to pay and no time to work for money. I also shy away from going into the BFA program because I know that I'm not as career minded as my peers in the department. I might like to do childrens books in my far future if I have the leisure time, but first and foremost I want to be a mother. Though a BFA would be essential to someone who wanted to make a living off their talent, I really just want to be a housewife. I know that that may sound aweful. I love art, and will get my BA for sure. I want to continue developing my portfolio at least on my own. Another, less important and more firivilous reason why I'm not sure the BFA program is for me is because I feel that I've really struggled in the art department. I know that my grades have not suffered, but my self-esteem has. I feel I came to BYU very confident in my abilities and having a passion for creating works of art. While here, though the critiques are to build our talents, I feel they have taken quite a toll on my artwork and personality. I have people come to me for art commissions and I want to turn them down because I have no more confidence in my work. I'm afraid that an extra year in the department will strip me more of what I used to love about myself. I know that sounds really depressing, and I'm sorry for that. For all the reasons that I feel I should not follow the BFA path, there is a pride in me that makes me want to do it. I know that it will be hard and I know I will be overwhelmed at times, but I know that I could successfully do it. I'm just wondering if pride is a good enough reason to continue? I truly hope I have not offended in any way, and I honestly would appreciate any advice you have to give. I'm sure you'll understand my situation and stances on why I might not want to continue, and I know you'll give me the best advice you can muster. I know this because you are a good man and a wonderful professor. I really love the way you teach and feel you sincerely care about your students. Thank you for taking the time to be concerned about my future, you're a good man.

Sincerely, Melissa Hudson

I'm afraid that his email was a last chance that the Lord was giving me to get my BFA. I pray about it and feel nothing. My sickness comes when I think of doing the BFA, it releases when I think of not doing the BFA, but comes again when I feel ungrateful for not taking their generosity and building my talents more. . . .What to do?

We are the Hudsons of Springville!. . . . Springvillians . . . Springvillans?

Blake and I, as of this Saturday will officially live in Springville! We found such a good deal on an apartment in downtown springville, just about 15 minutes south of the Y. Our apartment is a part of a tri-plex. We have our own front door with a little welcome porch. Might not seem like a big deal to all of you, but it's a lot better than entering our house from a door that looks like we'll be breaking in (our old apartment). The ceiling is a bit lower, but other than that, the new place has a LOT more room and we're especially excited over the extra space in the kitchen. We even have a back door! :) Even though the new place is a bit bigger, we'll be paying a whole lot less for it. It's only 475 a month and we only have to cover the electric bill.
Needless to say, we're really grateful that we were able to find something so soon. We'll be moving in about two days, leaving us plenty of time to get situated before we take off to San Diego for two weeks. Thanks to everyone who has been praying for us!

Monday, August 3, 2009

Body Power!

I just want to say something, mostly for the benefit of my husband. So, these past two weeks have produced a lot of pain for my feet. I fell off a skateboard (making it hard to walk for a few days), I split my big toenail right down the middle, scraped off the back of my foot, busted my ankle at the tumbling gym and got two fat FAT blisters from playing night games. Now, anyone who really knows me and how I am when I'm in pain or am sick will know that I don't take medicine, and going to the doctor is a last resort. I like to rely on my body's ways of healing itself rather than taking drugs. If I get a sliver (which I did last week), Blake will be the first to come at me with a knife or needle. He's afraid that it could get infected. I understand that it could get infected, but I hate having people poke me with knives and needles (is that so crazy), and I'd rather the sliver just work itself out. It always has for me. Friday night I was playing this great night game called "Heist". It was a blast and a half, but I got the two biggest blisters I've ever had in my life, on my big toes. Blake, on cue, comes at me with that murderous twinkle in his eyes offering to prick the blisters himself so "they'll heal faster".
"It won't hurt" he promises, "it's just dead skin".
Well, I wasn't quite sure about that, so I told him as I often do, that I would prick it myself when I was ready.
. . . . . . . . drum roll please. . . . . . . . . .
This morning I woke up and SHAZAM!. . . both blisters were magically gone!
So, either blake charged at my toes with a needle last night unannounced to me, or my body did as it usually does, took care of it by itself, without scary needles and knives.
I rest my case.

That is, until tonight when undoubtedly the Lord will give me an infectious sliver just to teach me a lesson :)

Never Say Never

I never never NEVER thought I would be the type to actually have a blog, but by persistent "pushes" from mothers, blake getting it started, and mama hudson showing me how fun it is to make it oh so cute, here I am, typing a blog post! Island Park adventures are on the way.